I don't know about you but I have recently realized that lots of people around me are complaining more than they are praising. Why is that so I wonder?
Is it because we are exposed to too many things that now nothing satisfies us?
Or could it be that because everyone is doing it that we need to stand out more and make a stronger complaint?
Or could it be because we are now generally just a bunch of whiney people?
I remember once I went to Friday's and after our meal, my wife and I, decided to call the manager. We told the manager that we were very happy with the waiter's service. The manager then proceeds to call the waiter, the look on his face was of fear and puzzled. I am sure he thought we are complaining about him but little did he know we were praising him. One interesting thing about Fridays is that if a waiter gets praised by a client, all the other waiters will cheer and we the client will be given a badge to be pinned on our waiter's vest. To be honest, my wife and I were shocked as well. We thought we just wanted to praise him but we didn't expect it to be such a show. The look of the waiter's face was something that I could not forget, from fear to almost in tears. That incident thought me one thing that I felt was lost for a long time within myself. Is that we complain too easily and cheaply and we very rarely praise. I can't imagine how much more motivated the waiter will be and how it will influence the approach others will be. One thing I know, I love to be praised as well. Who doesn't?
Praising uplifts and motivates and just like anything else, over-praising will dilute everything. But I feel that we have to change our approach and learn the be thankful at least a little.
This pandemic I feel brought the best and the worse of us. Social media has become even more toxic than it has ever been. How a comment or a status can brew so much hatred. At times an innocent status can be turned into something so toxic just because one person decided that comment his or her demented view on it. A good example is a recent post by Man Utd striker Edinson Cavani. Where he replied to his friend's comment with something commonly said in his native country which is harmless and no ill intentions or racist. It was skewed until that message looked and sounds racist.
Have we become so negative that we can't say anything nice anymore? Have we become so sensitive that now anything said or posted by others may always have a negative agenda?
In fact, I came across some people and I am sure you have too, that have to complain about everything. Somehow they will find something to complain about.
"The room is too hot"
(installs aircond)
"The air cond is too noisy, the stairs are not designed properly and why is the sun so glaring?!"
(wtf?!)
That is just an example of a similar scenario I managed to witness. Of course, I changed some of the content but you get the gist of it.
How do we change? we have to change our chain of thought. Start by being grateful for the basic things that we have like being thankful for having a clean cup of water or have food on my table daily. My personal way to be grateful is that I am able to walk and breathe well, thanks to this incident I went through. Start with smaller things and gradually be thankful for the bigger things.
Secondly, avoid feeding your brain with negative toxic status, comments, or posts on social media. The moment I see a complaint post by my friend, I will just scroll through. It is funny how sometimes when I see the post I knew immediately who the person that posted it. I'm sure you see it too on your social media. Just scroll through, unless it is something life-threatening then please reach out to your friend!
End of the day, I am not saying to eliminate complaints but to have a good balance and try to have more gratefulness/praise than complaints. See how things start to change when you change your mindset. You will feel better as well and you will attract like-minded people as well.
Try it...
Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”
—Oprah Winfrey
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