Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Facebook... A Study

I read in a recent study done by some people who study things (always amazes me that ppl study in a university, leave and spend their lives studying things) that Malaysians have the most number of friends on Facebook. Before you "Bookers" start patting yourselves on the back, a little info first. Japanese people have on average 29 friends, Norwegians a little more. Malaysians... In the hundreds. You know why? Cuz the Japanese and Norwegians are private people. When you see their friend list, those are their "REAL FRIENDS". Not classmates, colleagues, acquaintances, massage therapists, hookers, blah blah. FRIENDS. Malaysians on the other hand will accept anyones request to be friends. And hence the numbers. Look. Your colleagues are for the most part not your friends. Not every person you work with is your friend. Sometime soon when a promotion is due, that person will stab you in the back and the front to get that job. Your friendship and the fact you are facebook buddies will mean... (I'm gonna steal a line from the song WAR)... absolutely nothing nothing nothing nothing WAR! What are you good for? Absolutely nothing.

And here's another loser mentality about having 200 friends based on the following conversation:

NP: Hello. What you up to?
FBP: Oh nothing. Just staying in tonight.
NP: But its Friday. Why are you staying in?
FBP: Well I really wanna go out and stuff but I don't have anyone to go out with.
NP: Wait a second. You have 1000 friends on facebook.
FBP: Yeah, but those are like online friends. I dont know any of them.
NP: You don't know any of them? Bitch, have you lost your mind! You post shit all the time on Facebook. Where you are, who you're with (if you can manage to find someone who'll spend time with you), what you're doing!
FBP: So?
NP: So!!! SO!!!! Listen here you stupid heffer, if you have simply added people to your facebook page, chances are you have a serial killer, rapist or stalker that's looking at your page everyday. And now you're telling this person where you are and what you're doing!
FBP: Wait someone just rang the doorbell. It's midnight.
NP: There you go.
FBP: I'm fucked aren't I?
NP: Looks like I'll be seeing you in the obituary.

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