Saturday, June 16, 2012

Happy Fathers day

Its been two years since.... 

sometimes I look at people walking with their ageing dad having dinner or just plain having a fun chat. But sometimes I see people scolding and mistreating their dad. This just angers me as it is a gift that you have your dad to be there, to ask for advice, to ask for guidance and most of all to ask for love. 

I miss the times when I have a problem and I know my dad will surely have an answer for it. Be it a joke or a really spot on advice. I miss going out for lunch with him on a Sunday afternoons because my mom and sis wemt out shopping, I miss his stories about his journeys,  I miss watching football with him and listening him making jokes about players looks and names... but most of all I just miss him... but I know he lives in me...

So to those who still have their fathers around... love them as much as you can, appreciate them as much as you can and most of all care for them as much as you can!  coz you might not know when it will suddenly dissapear...


Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Its not the role, its the people

Ever since I took over so many roles be it in work or a society or a club, I realise that I have to deal with one thing and that is big fucking babies. Back then when I was a kid, I use to look up to adults and think, "Wow, these people are really good at what they do, I want to grow up being like them"

Then as you grow older and as you gradually work your way into the working world and you realise that what ever you depict when you were a kid is all not true at all. Like I mentioned earlier, that I have to deal with alot of adults, I found out that every adult have a bitch, baby or a fucking asshole in them. 

Sitting and taking care of them shows me what is this real world is all about. Everyone have an agenda and everyone is not entirely genuine. There is always a hidden agenda behind every good deed. I think its the society that made it this way. Dog eat dog world, corruption, power crazy or perhaps just plain jealousy! 

When I was a kid, we were thought in school and at home to be honest in what we do. Never tell a lie but you know what? "Never tell a lie" IS A LIE! and honesty? a big LOL to that! it reminds me of a George Carlin line "Honesty is the best policy, but you have to remember that apparently by elimination dishonesty is the second best policy!"

So is that true? 

Let us get back to the whole leading the people. The people pick you as their "leader" but somehow you are not the "leader" and when you be the "leader" they don't really listen to you. I have encountered a few situation where the leader is not experience but capable and the older and experience member of the team tends to overwhelm or apparently "help" the leader by giving advice. The intention was good but slowly and not noticing it, they start to take over. Advice became order, order became stern comments and suddenly when the leader voice out his disagreement, this older member gets unhappy. They throw their tantrum or they will complain and complain like a bitch themselves and instead of solving the problem, they didnt realise thar they have became the problem. Then when you say, "why dont you do it then" and its always this same lame pathetic remark "you are the boss ma, you handle la". In a tone that is filled with sarcasm that is at the same time mocking you. Sounds familiar? this has been experienced by many...

Sometimes I think back when I was in school, our meetings were more professional compared to the ones I attend now. The people were more dedicated compared to now. Like I said, its all about personal agenda and very rarely now you see a group of people fighting for the same cause without the influence of money or power. The power is to achieve self satisfaction, greatness and creating that beacon of light for others.

I admit that I am a man of passion, everything I do, I try my best to get the best out of it. But its really tiring fighting this cause alone. Especially when you have members who are just not on par with you or same wavelength with you. Its just tiring. Sometimes you just feel like giving up. Alot of people beside me ask me why am i still doing this? Why do I want to take this role as a leader? Its not worth your time dealing with all that doesnt appreciate you. My answer? coz I believe that one day I can make a difference. I believe that one day all that I sacrifice will be worthwhile. Again I am going to quote one person, John Rambo "Live for something or die for nothing"

Now I realise, like I mentioned just now, I use to look up to the people but it was wrong, I was looking up at the "concept" and image that they portrayed. And for me growing up with that image, I have intergrated it into my mindset that this is the ideal world whether people accept it or not. and I am not giving up hope Again, its not the role, its the people.

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