Thursday, April 28, 2016

The time conundrum

Well if you noticed my recent articles, it is all about time and looking back and remembering certain things. I am at it again! all thanks to Facebook Memories or "On this Day" function. Sad to say this is one of the first few activities I do when I get up in the morning, switch on my phone and go through the news and my FB. And this is always one of the first things that popped into my notification. "On This Day..." and things that I thought I have just done is already 2 or 3 years ago. Heck, some is already 5-6 years ago. I have been using Facebook for 8 years! 

It was just moments ago when I look at some of the postings I did recently and I thought I have posted it few days ago shockingly it was actually 2-3 weeks ago. That sudden surge of confusion of what ever happened in between those time? How did time fly so fast? 

I remember back in school, waiting for a half hour class to be over seems like eternity. Back then I felt that I did so many things in a day whereas now I can barely finish a few. Maybe it is the complexity of the work? Maybe not. Is this all about being an adult? 

A wise old friend of mine once told me, if you plan your day out, time wont fly away fast. You have to be conscious most of the time during the day, because most of us are not 100% conscious  most of the time. Sometimes we just auto-pilot on certain things or we focus too much on one thing and neglect the world. Perhaps that is what I am going through. Living sub-consciously for the past few years. And when I gain consciousness, I realised I have lost some time. Something that you cant gain back or buy back. 

But thinking back again, end of the day although it seems fast I am happy that it is all spent on the people matters most to me and doing what I am happy doing.  As much as it is a lost time, it is lost for a good reason. As this saying goes "Time flies when you are having fun" perhaps sub consciously I am actually having fun and I just stop smiling or stop appreciating it... maybe... maybe I am still that happy kid that just lost his smile on the outside like a faded once brightly coloured poster been exposed too long under the sun. Yes, I like that...

How did it get so late so soon? Its night before its afternoon. December is here before its June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon? -Dr. Seuss-

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

My Twilight Zone

I actually lost track of time recently. I recall clearly that I have wrote an article recently talking about my last decade that changed my life and I clearly remember writing it like 1 to 2 months ago and then I came in here and I checked the date, HOLY SHIEAT! it was last June! That is like 10 months ago! Almost a year ago! Oh my how time flies! I still remember telling myself while writing that article, that I will start writing actively again, hence the great number of article that month (2).  

the people of BR24
Since that article, I have moved on from my previous job at Bernama Radio24 and thanks to Facebook memories, I just realized that I have manage to answer myself in an article I wrote few years ago here entitled "Passion vs the world". Yes, I guess the "world" managed to win. I have moved on to a job that pays more and serves my current needs. Leaving the job that you love is never easy, especially a job that you dream of doing ever since a kid. But the world wins and I need to pay the bills. So I have to look at the second thing that I have passion on, branding. Like I said again, it pays the bills and life goes on.   

Besides that, one thing that I am really glad is that I managed to hold on to my passion, well at least a little bit as I managed to get a part-time gig at an online radio to do what I love most and that is radio broadcasting.. It doesn't pay monetarily and it not a daily thing but it pays passion-ly (if that is even a word!) and emotionally. I feel very happy producing or running a radio show, I don't know why. Maybe it is something that I hold very close and dear to my heart ever since I was a kid. Somehow I just feel happy doing it, even if it was for free! of course if there is a proper salary would be even better! Who wouldn't want to do their dream job and get paid for it? 

Now after a while, that little ember of a question started flickering back on... passion vs the world, who should I choose? I have now chosen the world, should I go back to passion or is there a new question on board? or should I find the world that has the same passion as I do? or should I create or change my current situation to what I want? I guess time and/or maybe my stupid-temperamental-sub-conscious-acting-hastily-and-not-thinking-straight will tell. Who knows what the future holds... perhaps I shall come back here and read after a long time again and laugh at my silly past or agree with him... who knows? 

Anyway, I'm out...

"Prepare for the unknown by studying how others in the past have coped with the unforeseeable and the unpredictable." -George S. Patton
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